Tuesday, April 30, 2013


Are You a Well-Defined Leader?

John Holm more from this author »

TransformingChurch.net

"I've rarely coached someone who decided that more knowledge or more skill would help them become a successful leader. Instead, what they needed to learn was more about themselves."
In my work as a professional coach, and with the help of others, I’ve learned what makes a successful leader. Many people feel that it has to do with technical and/or strategic skill sets or knowledge. Knowledge is important, but it’s not central. Others believe it is critical thinking skills. That too, is important, but it’s not what I’ve found to be at the core of a great leader.
What is needed in every great leader is for the leader to be “well-defined.” I’ve rarely coached someone who decided that more knowledge or more skill would help them become a successful leader. Instead, what they needed to learn was more about themselves.
A Well-Defined Leader is one who is internally aligned. What they say complements what they do. It looks like this:
1. Their thinking rules over their emotions.
2. They’re a non-anxious presence.
3. They have firm, appropriate boundaries.
4. They have clarity of self and their own goals.
5. They consider self when problems arise.
6. They welcome conflict that is centered on mission.
7. They know their own core values and live them out in actions.
Think of a leader you respect and would love to learn from. They most likely fit the description above. Now think of a leader who struggles, who does not have many followers. They are probably struggling to be well-defined in some or many ways.
Becoming a well-defined leader does not happen overnight. It is a process of growth and maturity. But there are some core steps:
1. Identify and articulate your core values.
2. Identify and articulate your goals.
3. Identify what makes you anxious, and ask yourself why — what is your life story that plays into that anxiety?
4. Identify and articulate the values and goals of the organization you lead within.
As you can see, it begins with learning about self, the good (core values) and what you struggle with (anxieties). Leadership always begins with truly understanding who you are, and what’s important to you. It moves to what your weaknesses may be. Knowing the good and the gaps in you is the core to good leadership. You can always gain knowledge and learn new skills, but even before you do — learn about yourself.
So, if you want to grow in your leadership, take the time to know yourself. That will take you on a journey of self-awareness. Once you are self-aware, you can begin to navigate leadership in more successful ways.

John Holm
After a career as a pastor, John is now a consultant with TAG Consulting. He specializes in coaching individuals and teams in the process of transformational leadership.

Source: sermoncentral.com

Sunday, April 28, 2013


Autopsy of a Deceased Church: 11 Things I Learned

Autopsy of a Deceased Church: 11 Things I Learned

Thom S. Rainer
http://thomrainer.com/2013/04/24/autopsy-of-a-deceased-church-11-things-i-learned/
April 24, 2103

I was their church consultant in 2003. The church's peak attendance was 750 in 1975. By the time I got there the attendance had fallen to an average of 83. The large sanctuary seemed to swallow the relatively small crowd on Sunday morning.

The reality was that most of the members did not want me there. They were not about to pay a consultant to tell them what was wrong with their church. Only when a benevolent member offered to foot my entire bill did the congregation grudgingly agree to retain me.

I worked with the church for three weeks. The problems were obvious; the solutions were difficult.

On my last day, the benefactor walked me to my rental car. "What do you think, Thom?" he asked. He could see the uncertainty in my expression, so he clarified. "How long can our church survive?" I paused for a moment, and then offered the bad news. "I believe the church will close its doors in five years."

Read the full story at www.VirtueOnline.org

Friday, April 26, 2013


 | 
Nov 7, 2012

8 Things Remarkably Successful People Do

The most successful people in business work differently. See what they do--and why it works.
runner winning race
Getty
 
12K
Share
I'm fortunate to know a number of remarkably successful people. I've described how these people share a set of specific perspectives and beliefs.
They also share a number of habits:
1. They don't create back-up plans.
Back-up plans can help you sleep easier at night. Back-up plans can also create an easy out when times get tough.
You'll work a lot harder and a lot longer if your primary plan simply has to work because there is no other option. Total commitment--without a safety net--will spur you to work harder than you ever imagined possible.
If somehow the worst does happen (and the "worst" is never as bad as you think) trust that you will find a way to rebound. As long as you keep working hard and keep learning from your mistakes, you always will.
2. They do the work...
You can be good with a little effort. You can be really good with a little more effort.
But you can't be great--at anything--unless you put in an incredible amount of focused effort.
Scratch the surface of any person with rare skills and you'll find a person who has put thousands of hours of effort into developing those skills.
There are no shortcuts. There are no overnight successes. Everyone has heard about the 10,000 hours principle but no one follows it... except remarkably successful people.
So start doing the work now. Time is wasting.
3.  ...and they work a lot more.
Forget the Sheryl Sandberg "I leave every day at 5:30" stories. I'm sure she does. But she's not you.
Every extremely successful entrepreneur I know (personally) works more hours than the average person--a lot more. They have long lists of things they want to get done. So they have to put in lots of time.
Better yet, they want to put in lots of time.
If you don't embrace a workload others would consider crazy then your goal doesn't mean that much to you--or it's not particularly difficult to achieve. Either way you won't be remarkably successful.
4. They avoid the crowds.
Conventional wisdom yields conventional results. Joining the crowd--no matter how trendy the crowd or "hot" the opportunity--is a recipe for mediocrity.
Remarkably successful people habitually do what other people won't do. They go where others won't go because there's a lot less competition and a much greater chance for success.
5. They start at the end...
Average success is often based on setting average goals.
Decide what you really want: to be the best, the fastest, the cheapest, the biggest, whatever. Aim for the ultimate. Decide where you want to end up. That is your goal.
Then you can work backwards and lay out every step along the way.
Never start small where goals are concerned. You'll make better decisions--and find it much easier to work a lot harder--when your ultimate goal is ultimate success.
6. ... and they don't stop there.
Achieving a goal--no matter how huge--isn't the finish line for highly successful people. Achieving one huge goal just creates a launching pad for achieving another huge goal.
Maybe you want to create a $100 million business; once you do you can leverage your contacts and influence to create a charitable foundation for a cause you believe in. Then your business and humanitarian success can create a platform for speaking, writing, and thought leadership. Then...
The process of becoming remarkably successful in one field will give you the skills and network to be remarkably successful in many other fields.
Remarkably successful people don't try to win just one race. They expect and plan to win a number of subsequent races.
7. They sell.
I once asked a number of business owners and CEOs to name the one skill they felt contributed the most to their success. Each said the ability to sell.
Keep in mind selling isn't manipulating, pressuring, or cajoling. Selling is explaining the logic and benefits of a decision or position. Selling is convincing other people to work with you. Selling is overcoming objections and roadblocks.
Selling is the foundation of business and personal success: knowing how to negotiate, to deal with "no," to maintain confidence and self-esteem in the face of rejection, to communicate effectively with a wide range of people, to build long-term relationships...
When you truly believe in your idea, or your company, or yourself then you don't need to have a huge ego or a huge personality. You don't need to "sell."
You just need to communicate.
8. They are never too proud.
To admit they made a mistake. To say they are sorry. To have big dreams. To admit they owe their success to others. To poke fun at themselves. To ask for help.
To fail.
And to try again.


10 Things Extraordinary People Say Every Day

They're small things, but each has the power to dramatically change someone's day. Including yours.
Getty
 
12K
Share
Want to make a huge difference in someone's life? Here are things you should say every day to your employees, colleagues, family members, friends, and everyone you care about:
"Here's what I'm thinking."
You're in charge, but that doesn't mean you're smarter, savvier, or more insightful than everyone else. Back up your statements and decisions. Give reasons. Justify with logic, not with position or authority.
Though taking the time to explain your decisions opens those decisions up to discussion or criticism, it also opens up your decisions to improvement.
Authority can make you "right," but collaboration makes everyone right--and makes everyone pull together.
"I was wrong."
I once came up with what I thought was an awesome plan to improve overall productivity by moving a crew to a different shift on an open production line. The inconvenience to the crew was considerable, but the payoff seemed worth it. On paper, it was perfect.
In practice, it wasn't.
So, a few weeks later, I met with the crew and said, "I know you didn't think this would work, and you were right. I was wrong. Let's move you back to your original shift."
I felt terrible. I felt stupid. I was sure I'd lost any respect they had for me.
It turns out I was wrong about that, too. Later one employee said, "I didn't really know you, but the fact you were willing to admit you were wrong told me everything I needed to know."
When you're wrong, say you're wrong. You won't lose respect--you'll gain it.
"That was awesome."
No one gets enough praise. No one. Pick someone--pick anyone--who does or did something well and say, "Wow, that was great how you..."
And feel free to go back in time. Saying "Earlier, I was thinking about how you handled that employee issue last month..." can make just as positive an impact today as it would have then. (It could even make a bigger impact, because it shows you still remember what happened last month, and you still think about it.)
Praise is a gift that costs the giver nothing but is priceless to the recipient. Start praising. The people around you will love you for it--and you'll like yourself a little better, too.
"You're welcome."
Think about a time you gave a gift and the recipient seemed uncomfortable or awkward. Their reaction took away a little of the fun for you, right?
The same thing can happen when you are thanked or complimented or praised. Don't spoil the moment or the fun for the other person. The spotlight may make you feel uneasy or insecure, but all you have to do is make eye contact and say, "Thank you." Or make eye contact and say, "You're welcome. I was glad to do it."
Don't let thanks, congratulations, or praise be all about you. Make it about the other person, too.
"Can you help me?"
When you need help, regardless of the type of help you need or the person you need it from, just say, sincerely and humbly, "Can you help me?"
I promise you'll get help. And in the process you'll show vulnerability, respect, and a willingness to listen--which, by the way, are all qualities of a great leader.
And are all qualities of a great friend.
"I'm sorry."
We all make mistakes, so we all have things we need to apologize for: words, actions, omissions, failing to step up, step in, show support...
Say you're sorry.
But never follow an apology with a disclaimer like "But I was really mad, because..." or "But I did think you were..." or any statement that in any way places even the smallest amount of blame back on the other person.
Say you're sorry, say why you're sorry, and take all the blame. No less. No more.
Then you both get to make the freshest of fresh starts.
"Can you show me?"
Advice is temporary; knowledge is forever. Knowing what to do helps, but knowing how or why to do it means everything.
When you ask to be taught or shown, several things happen: You implicitly show you respect the person giving the advice; you show you trust his or her experience, skill, and insight; and you get to better assess the value of the advice.
Don't just ask for input. Ask to be taught or trained or shown.
Then you both win.
"Let me give you a hand."
Many people see asking for help as a sign of weakness. So, many people hesitate to ask for help.
But everyone needs help.
Don't just say, "Is there anything I can help you with?" Most people will give you a version of the reflexive "No, I'm just looking" reply to sales clerks and say, "No, I'm all right."
Be specific. Find something you can help with. Say "I've got a few minutes. Can I help you finish that?" Offer in a way that feels collaborative, not patronizing or gratuitous. Model the behavior you want your employees to display.
Then actually roll up your sleeves and help.
"I love you."
No, not at work, but everywhere you mean it--and every time you feel it.
Nothing.
Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing. If you're upset, frustrated, or angry, stay quiet. You may think venting will make you feel better, but it never does.
That's especially true where your employees are concerned. Results come and go, but feelings are forever. Criticize an employee in a group setting and it will seem like he eventually got over it, but inside, he never will.
Before you speak, spend more time considering how employees will think and feel than you do evaluating whether the decision makes objective sense. You can easily recover from a mistake made because of faulty data or inaccurate projections.
You'll never recover from the damage you inflict on an employee's self-esteem.
Be quiet until you know exactly what to say--and exactly what affect your words will have.


How to read a commentary, and avoid my four rookie errors

How to read a commentary, and avoid my four rookie errors

By Chris Green
Special to Virtueonline
www.virtueonline.org
April 26, 2013

I nearly drowned this week. Not physically, but mentally.

I'd started work on a talk, and pulled four commentaries off the shelves. A couple of hours after I started using the first one I realised that I'd hardly begun. This commentary was B-I-G, with well over a hundred pages on my passage.

Should I spend all my reading time on that one, very good commentary? Or drop it, and try three much shorter ones? What's a preacher to do?

Read the full story at www.VirtueOnline.org

10 Things I'm Learning Leading Church Change

10 Things I'm Learning Leading Church Change
I tend to like change. I think it’s necessary if any organization, church or relationship wants to grow … or even remain alive. But I'm certainly learning a few things along the way.
I am almost eight months into a new pastorate. I left the church planting world to help revitalize and grow an established church. Many pastor friends questioned me at the time, but now they … and people who follow this blog … consistently ask how the move is going. Thank you. I feel the support.
Honestly, it’s proving to be challenging … maybe slightly more than I thought it would be. But, God is allowing us to experience incredible energy and excitement. I am not big on sharing numbers in 


this format, but let me simply say … they look good. God is working. Amazingly working. The potential in the days ahead is astounding to me. There are many great people here and we’ve assembled a stellar staff team.

Needless to say, I’m in the midst of change. That’s not unusual. I tend to like change. I think it’s necessary if any organization, church or relationship wants to grow … or even remain alive. But, some change has come fast. It doesn’t necessarily seem fast to me, and certainly not monumental, but I know, in a church that’s over 100 years old … it’s been fast.

For the most part, the reception to change has been good. Still, change, no matter how necessary, is never easy. Along the way, I’m learning a few things. I share this not only as an update, but knowing over fifty percent of the readers of this blog are in ministry, hopefully some of what I’m learning I can share with you.


Here are 10 things I’m learning in leading church change:


Don’t try to be the church down the street. You have to be true to the DNA, heritage and culture of the church you lead. That doesn’t mean don’t change, but does mean change should be relevant to context.

Don’t oppose the old. Encourage the new. The old got you to where you are today. It’s not bad. In fact, at one time it was very good…the best. The old was once new. The new is simply where the most energy is at currently. (Someday it will be old.)

Celebrate history. People were there years ago, building the church where you serve today. My granddaddy would say, “Don’t forget what brung ya!” I especially love hearing the stories of how the church grew through other times of change.

Many times information overcomes objection. Many times. You can’t over-communicate in times of change. The more they know the “why”, the less they will resist the “what”. (By the way, my interview with Zig Ziglar confirmed this principle.)

It sometimes seems easier to let a church slowly die than to try to change things. There. I said it. But, it’s true. Some people are not going to want the church to change. Period. End of story. And, most likely, they will find a way to let you know. (Most likely that will be some way other than telling you…but you’ll hear it.) But, that doesn’t mean the church can’t, won’t and shouldn’t change…and thrive again.

Change is uncomfortable for everyone. It’s just more uncomfortable for some than others. You might read THIS POST about a recent sobering reminder I had about the relativism of objection to change.

Some days all you’ll hear are the critics. That’s true too. I think Satan even has a hand in this one. You’ll think no one is on your side. You’ll think you’re wasting your time. You’ll have a one-day (or multiple day) pity party. On those days, you’ll need to remember the vision God called you to complete. Keep going.

The degree of pain determines the degree of resistance to change. When people are injured…or afraid…or lack trust, they are more likely to cling to what’s comfortable and resist what’s new. That is true in their personal life or their church life. When leading change in a place where injury is present, there will be resistance based solely on that pain.

The best supporters are often silent. I don’t know why. They just are. They are satisfied. Happy. Ecstatic even. They just don’t always tell you they are. But, good news, they are usually telling others. And, that’s fueling more growth.

God is faithful. You knew that one, right? Somehow, just when you need it most, God seems to send an encourager. Awesome.

What have you learned in leading change?

Source: churchleaders.com

7 Wastes of Energy for Leaders

7 Wastes of Energy for Leaders
Some days I leave work and feel I never got off the treadmill. It’s physically and mentally draining. Does that ever happen to you?
Wasting time and energy may be one of my biggest pet peeves as a leader. Some days I leave work and feel I never got off the treadmill. It’s physically and mentally draining.
Does that ever happen to you?
I firmly believe if we get rid of common energy wasters we can dramatically improve our performance as leaders. With that in mind, I’ve spent time in my personal development finding ways to eliminate time and energy wasters.


Here are 7 common wastes of energy in leadership:


Focusing attention on the naysayers – I have found that worrying over what the critics are saying, especially the ones I will never make happy, delays progress and takes time from and frustrates the positive people who believe in the vision and are ready to move forward.

Refusing to delegate – When I make every decision, or become too controlling as a leader, I rob myself and the team of valuable energy and talent and I feel overwhelmed more quickly.

Second guessing decisions – I find it is better to work to make better decisions moving forward rather than live in a pity party of bad ones already made.

Trying to have all the ideas – Many leaders feel they have to be the originator of all the creative energy of a team. They waste time brainstorming alone rather than expanding the creative process. Consequently, the best ideas often never surface. Original thoughts, better than ours, are usually in the room or the organization if we will welcome them to the table and it preserves my time for more efficient use.

Living with broken structure – Let’s face reality. Over time, rules take on a life of their own. What was once created to improve structure actually begins to slow progress and waste valuable time. Change the rules…or even drop them… and you often free up valuable space for people to breathe and enjoy their work.

Disorganization – Need I expand? Many leaders feel overwhelmed because they don’t have good organizational skills. Learning how to better handle routine tasks such as processing emails, calendaring, and scheduling work flow each week will drastically improve time efficiency.

Completing tasks not designed for me – This could be any number of things. Even reading a book. For example, perhaps a silly example, but I have discovered that sometimes I read too much. That sounds strange…I know…but really it’s because I read things I didn’t need to read. I start a book and within the first chapter I know it’s not helpful or even enjoyable…my sense of completion wants to finish. but, better is to put it aside and pick up another book. The novel length email…I try to determine first if I’m the one who should respond. Many times I’m not. It could be attending a meeting…or supervising a project. Whatever it is that I am not the best person for the job or it is just a time waster, the sooner I stop it or hand off the task, the more energy I preserve.

What energy wasters have you seen in leadership?

Source: churchleaders.com

What Does "Healthy" Mean in Church Leadership?

What Does "Healthy" Mean in Church Leadership?
Is there really such a thing as a healthy church? Are there any healthy church staffs? And what does healthy mean, anyway?
I was talking with a young hurting pastor recently. He resigned after several years of trying to turn around a dying church into a healthy church. The church brought him in with definite goals. He felt he had a mandate. The church began to grow. Things were exciting…or so it seemed. But, with every change there was growing resistance. Eventually, only a few people with power still supported him. when they refused to back him with changes they had agreed were needed. He was continually reminded this was

not “his church”. He felt it was best that he leave rather than divide the church. (This church has a long history of short-termed pastorates.)

In the course of the conversation he asked some sobering, and honest questions.
He asked, “Is there really such a thing as a healthy church? Are there any healthy church staffs? And, what does healthy mean, anyway?”

Great questions. I understand. Sadly, I hear from pastors continually asking the same questions. There are many unhealthy environments in churches.

But, yes! There is such a thing as a healthy church. There are some healthy church staffs.

I don’t know if I know completely what “healthy” means, but I’ve given the issue some thought.

The reality is that the church is the Body of Christ. In the purest form, the church is always “healthy”, because it represents Christ. We are promised that nothing will ever destroy what Christ has established. But, local churches are made of people. And, some of those people, even well-meaning as they may be sometimes, work together to form unhealthy environments. Some work together…for the common good of honoring Christ…and form healthy environments.
So, with that in mind…


A healthy church culture…

  • Doesn’t mean there aren’t bad days
  • Doesn’t mean you won’t have tension or stress.
  • Doesn’t mean everyone always agrees.
  • Doesn’t mean there aren’t relationship struggles.
  • Doesn’t mean you have all the answers.
  • Doesn’t mean the pastor is always right.
  • Doesn’t mean problems or issues are ignored.

A healthy church culture…

  • Does mean you can disagree and still be friends.
  • Does mean tension is used to build teamwork..when one is weak another is strong.
  • Does mean meetings are productive and purposeful…not ritualistic or boring, and certainly not hurtful.
  • Does mean rules add healthy boundaries, rather than stifling creativity or controlling actions.
  • Does mean you work as a team to find solutions.
  • Does mean the pastor (and his family) is never attacked publicly or continually stabbed in the back.
  • Does mean the rumor mill is never allowed to form the dominant opinion.
I’m praying for my new pastor friend that he finds a healthy church, in which to serve out his calling. They do exist.

Have you been in an unhealthy church or organizational environment?
Have you been in a healthy one?
What do you think it means to have a healthy?

Source: church leaders.com

Friday, April 5, 2013


6 Best Ways to Follow Up with First-Time Guests

3 Comments
Send to Kindle
Email
6 Best Ways to Follow Up with First-Time Guests
What are the best ways churches can creatively and authentically follow up with guests? Read on to find out!
There are a few things first-time guests expect when they visit your church. They expect to be greeted warmly; they expect to fill out a card with their contact information; and they expect someone from your church will follow up with them.
Fail to meet any of these expectations, and they aren’t likely to return for a second visit.
The guest follow-up is a huge opportunity to build a memorable connection, but it requires attention. It is crucial to develop a process and execute the process each week.
Remember, the guest follow-up is a significant role in the guest experience. Maximize the follow-up with creativity and authenticity.
Here are six effective ways to follow up with first-time guests:

1. Personal Phone Call.

This is one of the single most effective ways to insure your guests return for another visit. A simple phone call says the pastor of this church genuinely cares. And that matters, a lot, to your guests because this pastor might someday be their pastor.
If the senior pastor is not available, then a gender specific or stage-of-life pastor from your staff should place this call. If they have lots of kids, perhaps the children’s pastor could call. If it’s a single mom, then the women’s pastor would be a good choice. But a personal call is your first and best follow-up method.

2. Sincere Thank You Card.

Nothing says “Come again” like a sincere thank you. A handwritten thank you card is a genuine and unexpected way to say thank you to your first-time guests. The thank you card is now a special way of communicating, as all other communications are technology driven.
This personal investment says you care that they visited and, more importantly, that they visit again.

3. Face-to-Face Meeting.

Imagine that your guest is a family, brand new to the area, and someone from your men’s ministry calls and says, “Hey, I’d love to grab coffee with you this week.” During the meeting, they spend time learning about the guest and providing information about your church and ways to get involved.
Think that family will visit a second time? You can count on it.

For the rest of the article, go to: http://www.churchleaders.com/outreach-missions/outreach-missions-articles/165536-tim-peters-follow-up-with-first-time-guests.html?p=2

Squared off to Bunt (part one)

In some sectors of the church today there’s great momentum, clarity of mission, risk-taking experimentation, courageous leadership, and fresh reliance on the Holy Spirit for direction, empowering, and transformation.
49 RVQChurches are breaking out of the attractional paradigm and are moving their ministry focus off their facilities and into the community where those who need Christ are. Committed to love and serve people until they ask why, Christians are living the Gospel among the unchurched – and they are responding with surprise, with gratitude, and with saving faith in Jesus.
And, in other sectors, churches, ministers and members are bewildered. Attendance is falling. So is giving. Enthusiasm for church programs is low. Discouragement is high. Anxiety is epidemic.
Denominational systems feel this more intensely. Local churches are less able or willing to send money ‘up the food chain’. Regional and national budgets are being slashed. Programs and staff are being eliminated. Every forecast is more sobering than the last. The Church is aging…more rapidly than ever. Since most giving comes from the more senior members, their mortality portends the same for the systems their generosity built and sustained for decades.
49 bunt bLike a bewildered ball player, thousands of clergy and denominational execs who are “at bat” in this hour stand in the batter’s box…crouched to bunt.
The advantage is if you’re going to bunt, it’s the best stance to be in. The disadvantage: you can’t do anything but bunt from that crouch. And, here’s where many in the Church find themselves today.
Not sure how to stem the receding tide of dollars and attendees, Church leaders cycle from one well-worn, low-risk program to another.
49 bunt aBunt left.
Bunt right.
Bunt down the middle.
Trouble is, the “score” is so lopsided that laying down bunts won’t move us forward fast enough.
What’s needed is to restore apostolic momentum to the Church.
Apostles are “sent ones”. The apostolic Church was a sent church. In contrast to today’s stogy institutions, the early Church was on the move.
Its message: Jesus.
Its focus: heart transformation.
Its method: personal encounters as the redeemed loved, healed, and shared their stories.
For this to recur, our churches need to mature and mobilize Christians as ministers to those outside.